Things Not To Do On Public Transit:
1. Clip your fingernails.
2. Slather cream all over your hands.
3. Hum.
4. Whistle.
5. Mutter verses from a religious text.
6. Reveal the final score of last night's hockey game.
7. Talk loudly about a sensitive business transaction.
8. Adjust your thong.
9. Eat spaghetti.
10. Change your pants.
Inspired by my twice-daily train commute. Believe it or not, I've witnessed every one of the above.
Showing posts with label snark. Show all posts
Showing posts with label snark. Show all posts
Friday, April 8, 2011
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
The Daily Snark
I saw a woman this morning carrying a tiny purse, covered in zips and buckles. It was a proper purse, with a shoulder strap and everything, but I have to wonder what in tarnation is she going to put into it? A lipstick? One teabag? A single tampon? That's about all it had room for. You couldn't even fit a teacup poodle in there. Granted, it was shiny, and it probably cost her a week's groceries, but still.
See, I used to be the anti-purse. I prided myself on carrying a wallet like a man, and nothing else. I didn't need anything else, darn it! That all ended when I started wearing reading glasses. Which begs the question, what do men do with their reading glasses? Where do they put them? (Yes, alright - inside pocket. Which means a jacket. I'm a girl. I don't wear jackets with inside pockets.) But I digress; where was I? Oh yes, purses.
When I finally realized I was, in fact, a woman, and did, contrary to all my quasi-militant tomboy tendencies, require a purse, I did not go out and sink precious housekeeping money into either a teensy-weensy bit of patent leather that wouldn't hold a pack of gum, or its monstrous cousin, the sack. I'm sure you've seen women walking around with the sack: a shapeless fabric bag stuffed so full it threatens to break the bearer's shoulder. It is distinctly unattractive and makes the bearer look like a hobo. No, when I finally caved, I bought a satchel.
Here: I love it so much I posted a picture. Seriously, ladies, within about five minutes this became My New Favourite. I've had it over a year now and I absolutely adore it. It's not too big, not too small, I can fit my wallet, chequebook, sunglasses and yes, those all-important reading glasses into it. It has handy separate zipped pockets so that smaller items such as keys and lipstick don't get lost; and best of all, my cellphone fits in the front latched pocket so I no longer have to dig for my cell when it rings. The leather is amazing quality, buffs up a treat with a bit of dubbin, and Roots will even replace, for free, any fittings such as zippers, etc. if they break. Now that's old-fashioned customer service.
Shameless Promo: Roots Canada
Here endeth the Snark of the Day. Please feel free to comment, or if you have a snark of your own, I'd love to hear it.
See, I used to be the anti-purse. I prided myself on carrying a wallet like a man, and nothing else. I didn't need anything else, darn it! That all ended when I started wearing reading glasses. Which begs the question, what do men do with their reading glasses? Where do they put them? (Yes, alright - inside pocket. Which means a jacket. I'm a girl. I don't wear jackets with inside pockets.) But I digress; where was I? Oh yes, purses.
When I finally realized I was, in fact, a woman, and did, contrary to all my quasi-militant tomboy tendencies, require a purse, I did not go out and sink precious housekeeping money into either a teensy-weensy bit of patent leather that wouldn't hold a pack of gum, or its monstrous cousin, the sack. I'm sure you've seen women walking around with the sack: a shapeless fabric bag stuffed so full it threatens to break the bearer's shoulder. It is distinctly unattractive and makes the bearer look like a hobo. No, when I finally caved, I bought a satchel.
Here: I love it so much I posted a picture. Seriously, ladies, within about five minutes this became My New Favourite. I've had it over a year now and I absolutely adore it. It's not too big, not too small, I can fit my wallet, chequebook, sunglasses and yes, those all-important reading glasses into it. It has handy separate zipped pockets so that smaller items such as keys and lipstick don't get lost; and best of all, my cellphone fits in the front latched pocket so I no longer have to dig for my cell when it rings. The leather is amazing quality, buffs up a treat with a bit of dubbin, and Roots will even replace, for free, any fittings such as zippers, etc. if they break. Now that's old-fashioned customer service.
Shameless Promo: Roots Canada
Here endeth the Snark of the Day. Please feel free to comment, or if you have a snark of your own, I'd love to hear it.
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